Dark Girls: A Criticism of Colorism in America

On January 10th, Oprah and Iyanla Vanzant conducted a Life Class on colorism on Oprah's OWN network followed by a documentary entitled "Dark Girls". The intentions of the class and documentary was to shed some light on the light-skinned/ dark-skinned debate and the affect that colorism has on us African American women. I had recorded the show and did not get a chance to watch it, but happened to be flipping through HBO on Demand and decided that, in lieu of Black History Month, that I would instead go through my recordings and watch both showings.

I was very amazed at the documentary because I did not realize how present such an issue like colorism is, even in 2014. There were women of all shades, but mainly dark- skinned women, who were expressing their growing pains of rejection and lack of self- esteem due to the experiences that were endured when growing up. One young lady even explained how her mother had showered praises of her to a friend only to sum up her daughter's praises with the comment "Now could you imagine if she was light skinned how beautiful she would be?". These beautiful, dark skinned women expressed their lack of feeling desired by Black men, yet stated that they felt their most appreciated by White men and even White women who oftentimes complimented them on their skin and it's tone.

I started to think back on my own experiences growing up and I recollected a time when I was walking with my best friend from our school building to the car and a guy was walking past me and stated "You're real cute for a dark- skinned girl". I remember thinking that I couldn't tell whether he was paying me a compliment or insulting me. Yeah, he told me that I was pretty, but was he saying that all dark- skinned girls were not attractive and I just happened to be the exception to his rule? My mind began to wander even further and I began to think about a conversation that I had with my roommate. She is bi-racial (Black and White) and is what some would call "High yellow". I remembered that her and I had had a conversation where she was telling me that alot of people had expressed to her that they thought that she was stuck up when they first saw her because she was light- skinned. However, once they got to know her personally they realized that she was real cool and even sweet. She went on to say that when she was growing up in Alabama that the guys out there did not pay her no mind, so she thought that it was strange that the dudes here in Rochester (up North) found her to be so attractive.

Taking all of this into consideration, it amazes me that people still think this way. I don't believe that I am less than because my skin is darker, and truthfully I had no concept of dark-skinned/light- skinned until that young man made that comment to me that day. I remember thinking that light-skinned girls got all of the dudes, but that was usually because the dudes always tended to want light-skinned girls. Such foolery, however, did not stick with me nor did it fester in my spirit. I had emotional baggage that I was dealing with, but none of it had to do with the shade of my skin. SO I present the following question to you: have any of you out there experienced any hardships or rejections due to your skin tone? Do any of you choose to date based on a person's complexion? If so, then why do you choose one skin tone over another? Are these preferences learned or are they just preferences based on a person's own liking and dislikes? Please feel free to share your opinion!